You’re Joking Right? You BETTER be Joking!!!!

…Mama Knows best…(and swears a little too- that’s your warning)

As I was sitting with my youngest daughter at her first Girl Scout Daisy event of the year, my phone kept going off.  You know when you don’t know the number so you just decline it and think, “if it’s important they will leave a message…” DECLINE. I also put my phone on silence at that point so I wouldn’t be bothered during my Mommy and Peanut time.  My purse lay below me on the ground just vibrating.  And vibrating.  And vibrating.  I finally took the phone back out of my purse to find a text message, “It’s Jamie, answer the phone!”

I stepped outside and dialed the number back.  Jamie answered and I asked what was going on.  “I broke both of my knees at The Trampoline Place, I need you to come here.”  I am pretty sure I went into instant shock.  “You what!?  You what!?  You are joking right!?” (My husband is always making jokes)  To which he replied, “This is no joke, just come here.”   I again said, “You better be joking!”  Again he assured me it was not a joke.  And although what happened next is somewhat of a blur, I’m fairly certain I said something like, “What in the {INSERT F WORD HERE} are you doing THERE!!?”  He said something like, “Fine, never mind, I don’t need you.” And hung up on me.

The trampoline place was off limits to our family at this point (so Mama says), because of what had happened to my sister.  So of course, the only things that were going through my mind as I drove (very very very fast) to the Trampoline place in Gulf Shores were lots and lots and lots of swear words. LOTS of swear words. (WAY more than normal).

I pulled in to the parking lot to find TWO fire trucks a police car, and an ambulance.  It was NOT a joke.  I jump out and march (because that what you do when you are really really pissed) over to the ambulance where they are lifting my husband into the back. There was Noah, my son in the back with Daddy.  A tall man from The Trampoline place came over to me and said something like, “Ma’am are you ok?”  To which I replied something like, “No I am not ok. And I don’t know why my husband was even at this stupid Fu@king place!”   He kind of laughed me off and then told me that they were getting ready to take my husband to the hospital and I should just follow them there.

I arrived at the South Baldwin Hospital ER before the ambulance and went ahead and filled out paperwork as I waited. They called me back as soon as he arrived.

Jamie seemed to be in very little pain at this point, which produced a false sense of short lived relief in us both.  X-rays came back normal.  Again we were relieved but shocked because Jamie kept pointing out that something didn’t seem quite right about his kneecaps.  (It was soft where they USED to be).  But still not much pain.

CAN YOU SAY SHOCK?!

After several hours and several people viewing the X-Rays and assuring us we were only dealing with a pulled muscle (ha). It was time to get Jamie up and onto some crutches.  Again we were THANKING JESUS. (Jesus still loves me even though I swear sometimes…just sayin.)

So, the nurses sit Jamie up and gently bring his legs to a hanging position from the table.  Oh God Almighty I have never seen someone in so much pain in my life!  As soon as his legs were brought to that position Jamie suddenly began absolutely screaming in agony, his face turned completely white and his head bobbed backwards with his eyes rolling up in his head.  When this happened the nurses hurried to get him back into a resting position. I sat watching in horror.  Jamie was covered in sweat at this point- and the nurses decided maybe there WAS something they were missing.

POOF.

There went our relief. (I told you it was short lived).

Morphine was then administered, and the on-call Orthopedic surgeon was called in.

Trampoline Injury

After about 30 Min. Dr. Frerichs came in, introduced himself, felt Jamie’s knee areas and said, “Wow you are really unlucky.”

Patella Tendon Ruptures on a Trampoline in Gulf Shores